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Ecstasy Review

so on the friday after edward got here, we picked up some trojan ecstasy condoms. i really thought these were gonna blow our minds and feel amazing. boy was i wrong.

first, they're kinda big. edward is average down there, and these appeared to be for like a fat sausage. the shape is just odd, and really loose at the top (see image at the right).

second, while we went at it, the sensation felt nice. i thought, alright, i can ignore the size and looseness since it does feel good. however, after we finished our first round and tried to fuck again later, it was weird. i felt mentally turned on. ever down there felt turned on, but i wasn't wet. inside i was a little, but when i rubbed myself it hurt, and i couldn't get a finger in. when edward tried to push himself into me, it fucking killed. i felt like i was losing my virginity all over again. even when he licked me down there, it hurt. fingers, tongue, dick all hurt me. even when i touched myself it really hurt. i wasn't wet and i felt so much discomfort in my lady bits. it felt incredibly tender and sore.

i had him check me out down there and he said it looked red and swollen. i had an allergic reaction to the lubricant. the lubricant is different from the one on the trojan ultra ribbed condoms, and it totally made me swollen down there :( to say the least, it killed the mood. we couldn't have sex even though i was so turned on, it just hurt too fucking much. so, we're sticking to the ultra ribbed ones. i would not recommend the ecstasy ones if you have sensitive skin down there. it's not that much of a difference and certainly not worth the discomfort/pain.

god damn that's a big picture of the condom. too bad it won't let me size it down. arrg.

F & G spot marks the spot

last night as i gave edward his final blow job for three months, i let my tongue glide over his frenulum. i sucked, licked, and nibbled lightly this sweet little hot spot as i played with his balls. it goes without saying that he fucking loved it. i did this for a while, and when i came up to see how i was doing, he told me he was really close to coming. not long after he fucked me bent over, he turned me around and jacked off a yummy load into my mouth (yes i've swallowed about 6 or 7 times while he's been here).

he also fingered me in the most vigorous fashion last night, and it was something different but oh so fucking pleasurable. he took two fingers and shoved them in and out of my cunt really hard. it was pure fucking bliss. he hit my g spot over and over again, god his hands work magic.

side note: he gave me a compliment the other night. he told me i have always been amazing at sucking cock, but every time i go down on him, i do it that much better. it's safe to say i'm good at giving head ;)

p.s. i need to give my review on trojan ecstasy condoms. let's just say it definitely brought on a feeling alright...

Exhaustion

i feel exhausted. 3 hours of sleep doesn't do the body good. i've cried so much in the past two days, and it has physically drained me of all energy. i think this morning's goodbye was the hardest one so far, which led to more tears. i love him, more than i have ever loved anyone or anything.

last night as we lay in his bed, i saw he had a eyelash on his cheek.

"make a wish."

"i already have my wish."

god damn he's good, and it made me cry, because i know that he really loves me, and that isn't always the easiest thing to come by.

as we said goodbye this morning, we didn't want to let go. the tsa guy that checked him in at the security check point said something to him and nodded to me. i later found out he asked "will you come back for her?" his answer: "of course." as he climbed the escalator, we said our last i love yous & i saw him cry for the first time.

i feel depressed at the moment, and it sucks. i know it'll pass, and i know that i can make it three months since i've done it about 4 times now, but right now i just feel so fucking down. i get so used to him being here, i can just walk into his room at any point and kiss his gorgeous face. i can lay with him until 1 in the morning with his arms wrapped tightly around my body and know nothing can get to me. i'm with him all the time when he's here, and it's hard to not grow dependent of that.

i really cannot wait to graduate to be with him. i want him forever, and he wants the same.

sigh.

How did you decide your college major?

i always loved psych, and was always incredibly interested in sexuality. i started pre med & it took me 2 years to realize what i really wanna be. so, a psych major and a minor in lgbit studies seems to suit me.

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Lesson

i've learned an incredibly important lesson today: make sure no one, i.e. your dad, will be coming home when you decide to hop in the shower with your man.

i don't think they know, but i have this slight feeling my brother does. sigh.

Updates

sorry i've been lagging on posting, just been incredibly busy with finals. i finished two today, and i already know i got an A+ in my music class. pretty bomb :)

let's see....we've been having sex pretty much everyday with the exception of last night. my poor baby is sick :/

i'll give you guys the jist of what's been going on:

sloppy, wet blow jobs. ones that make his entire body twitch in pleasure. i've also found that i'm quite into licking his balls and he likes it too. he digs his fingers into my body whenever i do it, i'm going to take it as a sign that he realllyyyy likes what i'm doing ;)

i've had my daily orgasms, which rock my entire body.

and, we've had great sex. like great sex. the other night we actually made love. we hardly ever do it; it's not that we don't like it, it's that we are always caught up in the moment of hard fucking. anyways, we made sweet, passionate love. it was sooo romantic, and for the first time ever, i cried during sex. i cried as he made love to me because i knew and i know that in a few short days he's going to leave me. it was the most passionate thing we have ever done. he whispered i love you to me and i did the same. i have to say, it was perfect. the crying didn't even kill the mood; he knew where the tears came from. i'm actually tearing up right now because i hate thinking that he's leaving in just 3 days. i don't wanna even look back at him right now because i know it makes him sad to see me cry. sigh.

i still need to post our first day. i keep lagging it, but then again i've been so busy with finals. i'll do it when he leaves probably.

hope you're all doing well ! drop by formspring & ask me something :)

Recap

recap of last night & tonight:

• fingers in my cunt
• my mouth on his dick
• 69 foreverrr. & amazing 69 at that
• reverse cowgirl, a first & very amazing as well
• doggy style
• him on top
• cum shooting down my throat

that about sums it up. i'm too tired to go into detail. but, i will post on our first night, just not tonight. i know, ima tease ;)

Tonight

me crawling into bed with him and sliding his fingers down my panties.

him shoving his cock down my throat, making me choke.

me laying down on the floor for him to eat me.

him licking me from bottom to top, making me moan.

me feeling him thrust inside of me.

him flipping me onto my side to fuck me like that.

me loving every second of it.

him telling me he wanted it in my ass now.

me bent over on all fours taking it in the ass.

him thrusting while i squeeze, fucking my ass like crazy.

me dripping wet from it.

him coming in my ass.

me coming as he rubs my clit.

us both dead tired from an amazing fuck.

i'm getting wet just thinking about it ;)

ps. yes we have fucked since he has been here. yes it has been amazing. yes i will probably post on it, but i haven't decided. enjoy my slutty readers ;)

Wax

i got my lady bits waxed today and it looks so nice & clean ! i love the feeling of no hair down there. i'm sure edward will love it tonight ;)

in about 5 hours i will be seeing him, and i am incredibly excited. i'm sure i'll be blogging about all of our sexcapades within the next 11 days ;)

List

here's a list of things i need to bring to hotel on friday:

• lube
• handcuffs
• sex position book
• blindfold
• vibrator (possibly)
• lingerie i may or may not get into

i think that's it. should be a very fun day ;)

less than 48 hours & he's mine.

Four

geeze, i always cave. i was super horny all day yesterday. like alllll day. so i touched myself and had 4 wonderfully amazing orgasms.

i'm done this time, i swear.

Oh.My.God.

wow. that is pretty much all i can muster up to say at this second. few things:

1. i lost tonight.
2. i'm gonna be his slut all day friday.
3. i'm not going to touch myself until thursday night.

let's start with numero uno. he came home and we started chatting and after ten minutes or so, he started saying dirty things to me. i could feel everything build in me; i could feel my clit throbbing and my pussy starting to soak. his words got me going so badly.

"baby, i need you to touch your clit for me. i just need it. please, for me. this isn't a matter of winning or losing, i need you to do it."

i protested and made him promise i wouldn't lose, but he wouldn't do it.

"i'm taking control. i'm dominating you right now. this isn't a request, it's a command. do it."

i was fucking dying. i did what he wanted, i rubbed my clit, and oh.my.god it felt fucking amazing.

"baby you are turning me on so much. i wanna eat your pussy so badly. i wanna spread your ass and lick it and then fuck your ass so hard."

i brought myself to the brink of orgasm and stopped; i didn't want to lose. he started saying dirty things to me again, but this time, he made it clear i'm his and his alone.

"you're mine. i wanna fuck you like the little slut you are. you are my slut. i'm gonna use your body. are you my little slut, baby?"

me moaning into the phone, mmmmmhm as i rub my clit. i stopped again and asked him what is in store for me if i lose right now.

this brings us to two: i'm gonna be his slut. i'm going to have my body fucked in every position imaginable. he's gonna lick my cunt as soon as he gets into the room. he's going to fuck my throat and come all over my face. he's going to bend me over in the shower, eat my ass, fuck it, and then come in it. he's going to handcuff me, lay me on my stomach, and then fuck my ass again. he's gonna go down on me until i come all over his face and then eat my come.

wow. i think losing is winning. so i did just that, i lost. i lost as he said all of those things to me, telling me i'm his slut and he's gonna fuck me so hard. i came incredibly hard from all of it.

he opted to not touch himself. he wants me and me alone to relieve him of this. and we're not waiting until friday. i'm fucking him thursday night, with everyone in the house. i don't give a fuck if people are home, we're going to fuck. and we wanna fuck a lot. i'm gonna ride his cock all night. as we talked about thursday night, i started touching myself again and had another amazingly huge orgasm.

he was dying though, he told me he was trembling and needed my pussy bad. he told me he's been craving it and that's why eating me out is going to be the first thing he does to me. no protests here ;) this leads us to number three, no more for me either. i know i've lost, but since i came twice tonight i can hold out for four more days. in four days he'll be here, and we're going to fuck every day at least once a day. probably 1-2 maybe 3 times a day. i'm looking forward to all of it.

a few side notes: he never calls me his slut. like ever. he's done it once before, but that's it. he's never used the word cock, only dick. and he sure as fuck has never said he might have to gag me in order to keep me from moaning thursday night. i don't know if he's been reading my blog lately, but if he has i'm pretty sure he's gotten the slut thing from some comments on a recent post.

baby, if you're reading this, i'm gonna fuck you like there's no tomorrow everyday you are here.

if he isn't, well i have no idea where all of this came from. he said it's from not doing anything in a while, and because he can't get the image of me naked out of his head. all of this dirty talk worked; i ended up giving in. but like i said, i think losing is winning in my case. i love being dominated. i'll have plenty of days to take control of him ;)

one more thing he said to me: "one day when no one is home and you least expect it, i'm going to go into your room, take off your pants, and fuck you hard. i'm going to be in control of you."

not only is he an amazing boyfriend but he is one helluva lover. he knows how to get me going. he's mine. and i'm his dirty little cock sucking slut.

goodnight ;)

formspring.me

When you Skype sex with edward, do you give head for him to objects? vibe, etc? When Edward cums do you ask him to play his cum?one last thing, I think I finally met somone with sex on teh b

i've never done it over skype, but i have created a video from my cell of my licking something up & down to give him an idea of what i want to do to him.

i don't ask him to play with because i'm not really into that. if i'm there though, i lick it off of him or swallow it.

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Have you ever been watched? Either masturbating, giving head or fucking?

i think a guy saw me giving edward head in his car. i think haha. everything else, not that i know of.

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even if there's a party at your house.you still masturbate?

well i don't really have parties at my house. when i say i do it when people are home, i mean my family as in brother & parents.

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Why don't you touch yourself while watching porn?

i don't know, i just can't. if it turns me on, great, i'll do it once i finish. i just can't imagine me in front of a computer touching myself to porn.

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So even if you're alone outside you will touch yourself?

not outside. i masturbate in the comfort of my own home, even when people are home.

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Tattoo.

i want one. i'm tempted to get one on my side where no one can see. i want a verse from one of my favorite songs. this may be something i'm gonna do. hmm...

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So when you watch finish porn then you start touching yourself?

if it's good porn, yes.

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when you're alone and there's no one and have totally nothing to do and feeling horny, do you touch yourself?

alllll the time. i touch myself when people are and aren't here. and i don't necessarily have to be horny, but i'll do it cause it feels good and i feel like have an orgasm.

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Do you like porn? Are you into it?

you know, i've only recently begun to like it. i've been watching it for years though, mainly for "educational" purposes. if it's good porn it'll turn me on and i'll get wet from it. that usually leads to me touching myself. but i don't watch porn and touch myself. i watch it, turn it off, then play with myself.

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Wreck

i an emotional wreck as of the last 10 minutes. tears streaming down my face, deep heavy gasps for breath, and feeling fucked up to the core. what brought this on? i really couldn't tell ya. i break down sometimes and i have no clue as to why. i feel empty when i do, and much of me just wants to forget everything. i know i have some psychological problems. they're not dominant in my life, but when they surface i am a wreck. god bless edward for doing everything he does, including saying things that helps me get through everything.

i find myself terrified that he'll leave me. and it gets to me, because i love him. i know he wouldn't unless i pushed him away, but since he left once before, i can't help but feel that pain once in a while.

"do this one thing for me: tell me how much you need & love me. i need it right now. i need to know i'm the one."

"youre so the one (insert heart he sends me here) i love you like no other."

those words are music to my ears. and just like that, i feel eternal love.

i know, i'm a wreck.

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so what are the most revealing cloths you worn out before?

I've worn an incredibly short dress that shows off my tits & ass. it's grey & black and has a zipper down the middle that leaves little to the imagination ;)

i have worn lingerie out in public, but that was for halloween ;)

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Almost there

in about 9 days my edward will be here kissing me, making love to me, holding my hand, laying with me, watching movies with me, doing everything with me. i miss him more than anything, and i am dying to see him. 2 and a half months wasn't so bad, but boy do i fucking miss him. i cannot wait for the day that we finish school and move into together. i just want him, that's all.

i'm in a sappy mood, sue me.

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have you ever been bent over something and fucked? Couch, table, etc.

All the time, over tables and counters. I love being bent over and pushed up against a wall, like he can't wait anymore and just needs to have me now. I've been bent over roughly, had a dick shoved into me, have my hair pulled, and get fucked ruthlessly. It may not be over something, but doggy style any way feels amazing.

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Boy shorts, panties, g-string? Do you wear lingerie?

Boy shorts. They're sexy, and make my ass look great. My favorite undergarment lately are these incredibly soft panties from VS that make my ass look great too ;)

I wear g-strings & sexy lingerie for Edward ;)

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do you sometimes don't wear bra or panties and go out?

I always wear a bra cause my tits are too big to go without a bra. I've gone commando before, but not often. It's not the comfiest thing in the world haha

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