it does kinda bother me that he doesn't compliment at all. maybe he does once in a blue moon but i have to ask for him to gimme a compliment. i hate fishing for them, i feel so desperate. but he never gives them to me, so i ask him, "do you find me pretty?" and he tells me yes. but why is it so hard for him to tell me that on his own? why do I have to ask for them? and when i ask he gets upset because i'm asking him. i just really do not understand why he can't compliment me.
& it's not only the compliments but every now & then he acts like nothing is a big deal to him. kinda like he doesn't care about anything. & it frustrates me to no end! i know he loves me & cares about me but when i ask him things his response is something along the lines of, "it's fine" or "sure," like nothing phases him. & when i confront him to let him know how i feel he acts like i'm the one being dramatic & looking too much into things. maybe i am, maybe i am a little too needy. but honestly, i'm kinda a simple girl in my eyes & i really don't think i'm asking too much. i thought most girls like hearing their boyfriends give them compliments. & i'm pretty damn sure most girls want their boyfriends to act like they care. is this just me? it's so frustrating. i would totally love some feedback. i hate picking fights over bullshit with him, but this stuff bothers me & it doesn't seem like it matters to him :/
Okay, so I have a question for you. If your boyfriend is 3000 miles away, when or how do you see each other?
ReplyDeleteWe see each other every couple of months. So far it's been about every 3 months. Why do you ask?
ReplyDeleteWell I was trying to get a feel for how often he visually sees you to be able to pay a compliment. Women tend to over analyze things a bit, but if he never tells you how beautiful you are when he only sees you every 3 months I think something is wrong. You should be able to talk to him and get more than a one-sided argument. I know he probably feels that since he is away, when he gets back to see you he doesn't want you to nag or fight with him. If you guys don't fight at all it wouldn't feel real. All I can say is give him some slack and the next time you see him be extra loving. It he still acts like things don't matter then you might want to rethink this relationship. Unfortunately, some relationships tend to fizzle out and it can be hard to keep the fire lit. Good Luck!!
ReplyDeletethank you for your advice. i think you're a little confused in how often we see each other. we see each other every 3 months but for only about a week at a time. so right now he's not here & that's what makes things frustrating because of miscommunications.
ReplyDeletewe actually talked about the whole not-complimenting-me-thing & he explained to me his reasonings. & he said he would make an effort to tell me that he still finds me beautiful even though we only see each other every 3 months. the last time he saw me he gave me a compliment that made me feel amazing. & because he doensn't see me that often it's harder for him to give me tons of compliments when he can't see what i'm wearing, how i look, etc. and i do know that i actually nag him a little too much but if you read my new post you'll see that we've figured some things out. & he promised to try harder for me as well.
i think last night was truly one of the ground-breaking moments for us & we worked through something that could have been a hell of a lot worse had we not talked about it. so i am much happier now that we've talked things through. but thank you so much for your advice :)
okay so i totally posted this huge response to you last night & it's freakin' gone. if i had any energy i'd re-write it but i am way too tired.
ReplyDeletenevermind, it's there haha
ReplyDelete